What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
Pizza is the life boat of my drunk Titanic
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
Remember when you walked in on me sleeping INSIDE a pillowcase?
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
Randomize
