I puked a lego.
My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
I thought I was drunk because I kept grabbing his arm instead of his dick
But then I realized it wasn’t his arm and that I was very lucky
Randomize
