he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
I just used 'come play with my balls' as a legitimate booty call attempt. And it worked.
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
They have beer where we have blood.
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
Randomize
