i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
Dude, sorry for live texting you my binge drinking. If you'd like me to do the same for my hangover, I can share that I just had to sit down while q-tipping my ears.
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
Is it okay to mention my ambition to become a supervillian and kill all humans on a first date, or is that a second date discussion?
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
Hey do you care to explain why there are 3 empty pickle jars next to me when I woke up or do I even wanna know?
Randomize
