these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
After throwing up in a tequila bottle on my nightstand (still not sure how she did that) she asked if she could slip into something more comfortable.
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
And I'm still awake, and you left me. Like the guy on Jurassic Park, that jumped out of the car expecting me to save myself while there is a man eating T-rex ready to tear my ass apart except theres a mathematician and paleontologist there to save me because they are bad asses.
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
Is it acceptable to respond to a declaration of love with 'and I love your dick'? Asking for a friend who shares a name and possibly a phone number with me. Entirely coincidental.
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize
