How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
Walk of Shame today included voting.
My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
Randomize
