hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
I am one with the molecules
I'm honestly wondering if my vagina did something to offend the universe
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
No one needs to know about the barren wasteland that is my vag. Sometimes i visualize my cervix rocking back and forth wondering where everybody went.
I just pictured that. It's reading a book.
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
Randomize