Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
No, I left myself a half eaten cucumber and a beer next to my head, pointed at it and said 'you're breakfast' and then passed out.
We're downstairs cleaning up and she turns to me with these big puppy dog eyes and says "Just so you know, I didn't have sex on your couch". You have to hug that.
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
Woke up at noon, still drunk, naked, with another girl next to me. When she wakes up, I'm gonna have my SECOND lesbian experience with her. How's your 2015 going?
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
Why would you call when you knew I'd be having sex!?
Why would you answer?
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
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