We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
Last night was the first and hopefully last night I will ever sleep in a hotel bath tub. Sober mind you.
I'm not even gonna ask.
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
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