i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
Just promise me you won't ring in the new decade by clutching onto a toilet
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
Randomize
