i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
Promise me that if I become one of those sad people that facebook pesters you to 'reconnect with' you'll tell me so I can delete mine and save myself the humiliation?
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
Will you judge me if i do shots in my basement closet first? No? Okay good
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
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