It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
My booty call is in the theater watching Deadpool right now. Never though comics would work against me.
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
Randomize
