I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
you know you were way too high when you wake up next to a handwritten list of all the things you'd do for a Klondike bar
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
I deserve to be covered in dicks
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
Randomize
