ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
Robert just walked in drunk, grabbed my Jameson from me, told me to let him do his thing, and spilled it all over the coffee table. Then he told me to grab a funnel because he was going home.
Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
Randomize
