ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
imagine a blue Jetta with an ILLINOIS license plate that read JISLORD..... upon pondering it for 10minutes I came to the conclusion that J stood for JESUS and IF the license plate had enough room it would read "Jesus Is Lord"
My mom gave me a high five when I told her I was just using him for sex
You and your mom would make an amazing tag team
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
You are writing your college essay comparing yourself to Lady Gaga, Vladimir Putin, and Dale Earnhardt Jr. and you are worried about the conclusion sounding cheesy?
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
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