dude you just took shreks wife home. what the fuck is wrong with you
when a bears hungry he eats besides shes got her nipples pierced
I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
So i told him he was the 3rd i have ever slept with and then i found out he had actually slept with 5 other girls besides me. And his reply was well your number one on this hand.
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
What the hell happened to the sandwich meat I just bought?
After you smoked, you made 8 ham sandwiches.
Guess that explains the mysterious disappearance of the bread...
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
Randomize
