and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
If you are wondering why there is half eaten pizza in your pocket it's because you were passed out with it in your hand in my bathtub. Today's your b-day and thought I'd give you a good idea about what happened last night as a present
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
I spent ten minutes questioning her on what kind of cup she wanted... Then I asked what kind of water she wanted..
WOAH TOO HIGH
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
His nipple licking is glorious
Breakfast sounds amazing but can we do IHOP instead? I have to pick up a Plan B pill and there’s a CVS next to it
Randomize
