No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
Walking out of our apartment this morning to go to class, I saw a sticky note on the front door that said "get tested." The door was unlocked so did you bring some stranger back last night? I'm assuming you weren't referring to me...
I've discovered that regular handcuff keys, sadly, do not work on real police handcuffs.
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
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