Mr. Last Night just informed me I told him to be very quiet when he left this morning and high-fived him as a goodnight kiss. Drunk me is slutty and manly.
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
I love THIS fish, the rest of the ocean can go fuck itself. I am ahab and he is my whale
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
Call me and get me out of this conversation NOW. My coworker is talking to me about her birds having sex again...
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
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