Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
Just snuck alcohol into the hospital for my mom.
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
What happened to my knees?
You ate shit in front of the homeless people. They applauded.
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
Okay who let me pass out in a recliner cuddling a pitbull and a cardboard cutout of Orlando Bloom
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
Randomize
