Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
my mom is pro-life. I dare you to fuck me.
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
What the hell happened to my hand?
Well, you got in a fight with a cabbie while jaywalking, but we got you to walk away. The problem was 80 blocks away, when you punched a parked taxi for "running you over".
He came over and fucked me while my conference call was on mute. Working from home is the best.
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
she wants homewrecking advice
are you gonna teach her your ways?
obvs. i'm like her yoda.
He told his wife he was too old to pretend to be straight. She tried to argue. He walked two tables over and was like this is my highschool sweetheart and he's an excellent fuck, we're running away together. It was epic.
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
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