Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
I tried to discuss modern art with a cab driver after explaining that I only had one shoe on b/c a pitbull ate the other one. Wtf. Call me when you can.
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
We got Pizza Hut & Papa Johns, delivered within seconds of each other, and both delivery people did a shot. I was put on Earth for this moment.
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
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