why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
Look I'm really hungover so let's try this again. In 5 mins you're gonna call me and tell me that you're on your way with xannies, iced coffee and a back rub
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
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