He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
the thing I didn't realize I would miss about college is that at home you can't just dismiss your sex bruises as drunk accidents
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
Randomize