"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
My mom called me and we started arguing as usual. I finally screamed at her "I HEAR YOU AND THAT 30 YEAR OLD FUCKING!" and hung up. She hasn't called back yet. I win.
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
I love my life sometimes. I do miss being an adult, from time to time, but a little vodka always changes my mind.
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
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