I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
Just got a message from a guy on a dating site who says he helped me remove lime pulp from my eye in a club toilet 2 weeks ago.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
I've been up for almost three hours and it took me until JUST NOW to figure out that what I'm tasting isn't blood, just the minerals in the water. Fuck hangovers, man.
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
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