just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse.
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
The three of us were sitting silently in my dining room at 4:30 am, half drunk, eating cold spaghetti and listining to death metal. I need a fucking cigarette.
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
Randomize
