If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
eating toast while peeing. You think this what kanye meant by the good life?
honey bunches of taint.
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
The kids I taught this morning even knew i was drunk. One of them even said, and I quote, "You smell like my dad after he goes bowling."
I never kept track of who else he slept with. You think I have the time or the energy to keep track of every dick in my life?
Do you have any idea how hard it is to iphone keyboard type "roflcopter" when intoxicated?
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
I woke up and found piles of popcorn in a trail around my house, ending at a laundry basket full of pillows. What were we trying to catch last night?
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
Randomize
