May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
Dude, he danced with the dog that some random chick was carrying at the bar. Then the dog jumped out of his arms and ran away. THAT definitely deserves a drink.
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
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