Yeah no shit. My mom is giving me winecoolers as we watch a show abt alcoholics
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
There are thorn wounds on my balls, don't ever question my dedication to party again
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
Randomize
