roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
I am not exagerating when I say the thought "screw you future me" actually just went through my head
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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