Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
Silently passing ghastly beer farts as I move around the bridal department at Tiffany's. Call it my contribution to the holiday spirit.
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
My sister just showed me a snap chat that I don't remember sending, it was a picture of me with two big macs in my bra with just the words "BURGER TITS"
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
Randomize
