my dog ran away and came back with a marajuana plant. what are you doing tonight?
Just had a drunken guest at my hotel threaten to "throw a fuckin fireball at my face"
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
My mom is currently drinking alone in our kitchen singing the Dixie Chicks to herself so, hey, alcohol is forever and we should not be shamed for its use.
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
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