...there is blood under my fingernails.
...I hope my roomates are okay.
Dude I'm drinking a martini out of a water bottle, I've become my parents.
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
As of right now, my vibrator and a bag of snickers share the same drawer
Randomize
