He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
apparently I crawled into someone's bed and demanded they call me 'big dog' before shotgunning a beer
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
The true debate: do I prioritize going to bed and getting more than six hours of sleep or do I prioritize washing out various grease, leaf bits, and jizz out of my hair
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
Randomize
