she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
After getting rejected by him, I got a strangely pleasant dick pic from an unknown number with the caption: "I hope this gets you through the night ;)" It's like the Cock-Gods were shining down upon me.
Just told myself the phrase "You're not THAT single" while dressing myself
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
Randomize
