That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
Her husband keeps getting drunk and making out with me. Good news is I found the strep carrier. Bad news is have strep again.
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
So, the officer that worked my wreck, I'm rockin his world tonight. He saw me high on morphine in the ER. So he knows my level of crazy. Think he'll agree to wear his gun?
So many things can go wrong tonight.
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
Randomize
