This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
They thought "watering it down" meant adding more vodka
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
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