Yet again my drunken self has managed to find his way into the middle of nowhere with no shoes or recollection of what happened last night.
Then I guess you don't remember me driving you there after you tried making out with my girlfriend, dipshit.
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
Pretty sure that I got the MVP of wedding reception... woke up on the bench in the hallway of a hotel and we did NOT start the night there.
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
What's a nice way of saying 'I wish I hadn't fucked you.'
Randomize
