and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
So I craigslisted sugar daddies and I'm pretty sure I found us one if you can pretend to be asian.
I'm wearing sunglasses around my house. Douchebag status. The hangover is real.
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
That's when I realized I was probably naked in the wrong bed
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
Just a heads up that Dad just brought home a new Porsche and the sales girl he bought it from.
Umm okay. What are they doing?
They’re in the hot tub
Can I get divorced when I grow up?
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize
