I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
The doctor wrote 'condom retrieval' on my discharge paper.
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
So I cleaned out my gym bag. Found half a bottle of malibu.
You know, I could pretend I'm shocked but what's the use?
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
She slapped me in the face with a McDouble. Just threw it right at my face while I was driving... That is why we can't bring her out in public.
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
I got stabbed with a couple of chip crumbs during sex Saturday. Further proof I need to stop eating snacks in bed
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
in mid sex he pointed out my great gatsby tattoo and we started discussing themes and metaphors from our fave fitzgerald novels
you need to stop fucking English majors
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
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