I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
You know we have no secrets, right? I mean, you saw me shitting in a gift bag drunk and naked on Christmas eve.
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
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