i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
found the other keg... it's in the tree
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
You know what I'm hearing? Blah, blah, blah, I have pneumonia, blah, blah, blah, I'm a quitter. COME OVER AND PUT YOUR PENIS INSIDE ME.
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
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