Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
So it turns out the white chocolate in the bathroom is actually soap
a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
It was literally me in an evening gown and him in a tux with six bottles of Vodka at Jons.
And this was for your brother's Christening?
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
You opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a wall last night.
I have 20 seconds to get my life together and look presentable.
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
So it's official the pockets of my work apron exist solely for the purpose of secretly flipping off asshole customers and not losing my job.
She did NOT find it funny to come upstairs to find me with the word "MISERY" written on my forehead in magic marker and the label to the vodka bottle replaced with a scrap of paper taped around that says "COMPANY"
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
Randomize
