Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
Someone painted a weed leaf on my leg with red paint. Or blood. I hope paint.
Holy fuck just found a used tampon in the leg of my pants. it's not paint. It's. Not. Paint.
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
I'm at the drive thru window, five minutes out. If the bathtub is empty or you're dressed when I arrive I'm not sharing.
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
Randomize
