we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
He set an alarm on my phone to an infant screaming and puking to make sure i take my pill. its working.
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
Randomize
