im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
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