well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
Day two of not drinking, I think my cat is trying to eat me.
Psychosis secondary to sobriety???
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
That awkward moment when you are on your way to ICU and the only sympathy gift you can think of is beer and whiskey
Randomize
