you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
Randomize
