Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
Better skin, bigger boobs.. Birth control is INCREASING my chance of getting pregnant because people actually want to have sex with me now.
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
are you just going to ignore any texts involving my penis from now on? because thats going to shut down a pretty sizeable portion of our conversations.
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
Also, beer. Big fan.
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
Wait do we still get bagels if no one got laid
I know it doesn't seem right, but sometimes, bagels are just flat out called for.
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
90% sure I just opened a snapchat of you in a fuzzy bathrobe next to your ceiling collapsing
I need a rain check on breakfast. A frat boy said it was his dream to sleep with a MILF, I made his dream come true and he made me cum
There is no way I’m wasting 21 year old morning wood
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